My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He used the panoramic camera on his iPhone to take a picture of his dick. And it actually filled it. Pretty sure I just came.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Typical Sunday morning text...are you alive?
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
