Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
It came up in court that I told the arresting officer my name was Thomas Jefferson, and I was born in 1776. I almost kept a straight face. Almost.
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
It's cuz all she eats is salt lick, human souls, and fast food
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
