thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
She was sleeping without a shirt so I thought I wouldI sneaked a peek at her nipples..than I realized they were just warts...on her back.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Eating a TV dinner and watching Goosebumps on Netflix, the sad, sad title of my autobiography.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
