He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
Can vaginas get frostbite?
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
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