I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
He's my palate cleanser. He's my mint sorbet. He's my saltine cracker. He's who I fuck between people to make the next one better.
Dude i was hungover i didnt know she was in the shower, she screamed i screamed we all screamed and i just so happend to piss in the shower.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
come to Starbucks. I'm the fat girl eating a whole pizza sitting on the ground
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Eric was just sitting there open-mouthed swallowing sake from that squirt bottle for so long the lady across from us leaned over to her kid and told him not to end up like "the big alcoholic one"
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
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