He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
Just had a tv talk show interview in my mirror. Got into to some pretty heavy shit man, would have made good viewing.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
This is a mass text. Who in the hell shat on my stairs last night?
Randomize
