im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
obama could have borrowed sotomayor's dick when he threw out that that first pitch like a girl last night
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
i'm having taco bell mild sauce and tums for breakfast because i'm hungover and thats all i can find. it's like thanksgiving up in here
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
