If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Come see our sink grown plant.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
I asked for a dramatic "funeral" look for my makeup. They judged me.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
We were sexting and i didn't know what to say, so i said i wanted to wrap him in tortillas and devour him like a burrito. then i went on by saying that i liked my burritos with a lot of cheese.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
