its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
If it makes you feel any better about life I'm wearing yoga pants with granny panties and toms with socks cause fuck my life
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
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