i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
I was. I was trying to blow bubbles in the toilet after I threw up in it. They had to carry me everywhere. I lost a sock.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
Randomize
