It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
No one likes wet exercise unless it's vigorous sex in the shower
I AM A GOOD PERSON AND THEREFORE I DESERVE QUALITY DICK!
Why are your pants in the freezer?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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