i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I've blown a few things in my day
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
You never know true fear until you're on your period in a house full of white furniture.
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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