It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
We got the possum out of our house. We built a maze with our empty kegs and chased it with brooms.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Paycheck hits in 37 minutes and I literally just emptied my handle of Tito's. If that isn't budgeting like a fucking adult, I don't know what is.
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
I love you.
Bad choice
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize
