pedialite and red bull = repair kit
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
At my place... I'm gonna be honest though stonewall Jackson is not going to be able to rally the troops. Too many shots of tequila
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
Randomize
