Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
a bus full of elementary school kids may or may not have seen me pissing off my front porch this morning
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
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