Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
Dental hygienist just pulled two flakes of glitter out. And asked me how i've been doing with the divorce.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
It's my coworker's last day party and I'm the one who ended up shitfaced on the train with half a bottle of belvedere in my bag.
It's not my fault you have a job and can't get drunk on Tuesday's. Don't take your frustrations out on me!
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
I just want a boyfriend who will have sex to Disney Pandora.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
Sometimes you just gotta get high and go to a planetarium. Why can't he understand that?
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
Randomize