Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I just puked into a plastic bag at a red light. Go me.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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