She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
IDK but this explains my bloody dashboard.
Did you leave your blow razor here? I need it for crafts.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Randomize
