She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
I arrived home at 7am wearing nothing but my underwear and a fedora. I ate half a dozen deviled eggs. Put Katy Perry on repeat. And cried myself to sleep. We cannot go out on Thursday anymore
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
