Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
Sex on the scooter in the parking lot wasn't the smartest idea. Actual quote from the cop as he handed me the ticket and fist bumped me.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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