that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
You sprayed lemon pledge on your crotch because it was "dusty"
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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