i just ate that cheese stick that was in my purse from last night.
There could not be a more unattractive person. She just told me her period was so bad that she got sick. I think my penis retracted and killed himself
girl in front of me at starbucks just ordered 7 shots of espresso in her latte. welcome to finals week
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
he knocked over the vodka and juice...picks up the cup and says "yes", takes the last sip...doesnt even worry about the mess all over the floor and we continue having sex.
It' a whole new level of walk of shame. I'm carrying his sheets since I have a washer/dryer.
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
