they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
He probably tastes like german chocolate and coffee beans
Seriously though, my ovaries are trying to crawl out of my body and into his pants.
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
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