I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
she said 'i love fried rice', threw a condom at me and passed out naked.
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
i knew it was love when she pulled a beer out from between her boobs and offered it to me
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Randomize
