i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
how is it I left wearing underwear then ended up with none? and why is it they are on you?
Randomize