I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
Listen, I'm 30. If it doesnt involve a super soaker and some chicken wings, you can count me out.
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
It was a blind-side dick pic.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
