i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
I think her version of saying goodnight was being flung over a guys shoulder as he said, "Bitch. You don't need no shoes."
I want to play lord of the rings tonight. And by that I mean get really drunk, potentially lost, and go trekking through the woods or climbing shit. I want all of you there. You are the fellowship. This is a mass text. I am insanely high.
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
Spent the majority of my senior year drunk. Graduate of 2011, I think 2011. Probably.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
Randomize
