I think my vagina is haunted
Memo to the bitch sitting across from me at Swamp: no one thinks you're classy with your Louis Vuitton and your Burberry scarf when you're dragging on that cig like it was the last cock on earth and you needed cum for sustenance.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
and he says: but we did find out that your ovaries have never released eggs. first thing out of my mouth: so i didnt really need to take the morning after pill so many times in college?
not the response he usually gets im sure.
Nothing sez sunday morning like waking up in a phonebooth with a leg cramp.
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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