my mouth tastes like poor choices
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
You left a bit of molly on the table and my mom found it. She asked what it was, I said "not drugs"
She believed me because "leaving that much behind on the table would be a waste so obviously it's not drugs."
He sent me a dick pic from work, but I could see all the pizzas in the background. Now I'm just hungry.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
I always knew ther was a reason why we're best friends
Obvs our love of drugs
I like to think of it more as our love of curiosity
Randomize
