Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
