just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
You looked up at me and said "I'm getting a mattress made out of this SHIT. Goodbye certa hellllllllo concrete!" then you started counting sheep
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
