Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
just spent the last 4 hours searching ex-girlfriend porn to make sure there are no photos of me
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
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