Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
do you think they ever dumped Gatorade over Michael Vick's head after his dog won?
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
the mexican frat downstairs started singing this mariachi song, then out of nowhere some dude busts out a trumpet and plays along. is this even real?
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
