His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
The best part about daylight savings time this weekend is we get an extra hour to be fucked up.
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
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