sitting with a guy who's looking at the cum stains on the bed. Do you think he's convinced it's from the cat?
No. He thinks you're slutty.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
She asked me to head butt her and after half a bottle of whiskey that seemed reasonable.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
people came up our fire escape and one had a cut on his leg and he was beautiful so i told him i was an emt and bandaged it with princess bandaids
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
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