I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
My brother brings gifts into my room to wrap them. It's a pizza cutter and a box of condoms..
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Randomize
