Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Just saw all the pictures from the party. I'm wearing a different shirt in every single one.
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
As a member of the kink community, I feel grossly misrepresented
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