his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I THREW AWAY MY VIBRATOR BECAUSE IT INTIMIDATED HIM. WORST. DECISION. EVER
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Also I just sneezed literally 12 times in a row so violently...boogers everywhere. Sorry to ruin the sexting. I just felt like you had to know
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Randomize
