smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Randomize
