Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i feel so shallow. people in iran are using twitter to write hardcore nathan hale shit about dying for freedom. my last tweet was "i hate the taco shits"
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
What's the rule for getting in fights with homeless men in suits?
Here's a rule: don't
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Randomize
