Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
That's Danny the boy who threw up in the Doritos bag
Randomize