i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
Oh we were great hosts that night. We made sure to leave all the beds open by passing out on the bathroom floors instead.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
We need a shit load of segways right now
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
