He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
all we need is a web designer
and a bunch of prostitutes
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
Well I think it's fate. Considering march is my fave month because it's my birthday and st. Patrick's day. And his name is Patrick. I'm sleeping with him all through march. No question.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Randomize
