Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
pretty sure i saw you masturbating on chatroulette a minute ago. yes, i can recognize your cock
I THOUGHT I SAW YOU
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
I told the emergency room nurse I didn't want to stop and ruin the moment. She said safewords are there for a reason. Super condescending. Got her number though.
Turns out it's a fake number.
She was totally amazed that i had the pizza delivery timed to coincide with our nooner and that the delivery boy knew where the broom closet on the 3rd floor was.
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
Randomize
