you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
She showed up in lingerie and a turtle backpack full of bacardi. I think its love.
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
Randomize
