I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
Vegas should really enforce the buddy system because if not everyone is going to end up swimming during the water show in front of the Bellagio.
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
Three Decembers later, I'm looking at this fuckin Santa lingerie I bought and just realized my stocking never got stuffed....
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
