true best friends attempt to put quarters in each others butts. Thanks for the best birthday ever!
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You would think that an uncircumcised man would understand how the hood of a clit works.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
i will replace your cream cheese. there's enough for breakfast. you are my friend. i had guests we wanted bagels so bad im sorry. i left you notes. i love you. you have enough for a bagel or two and i will get you more. you are so pretty.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize
