dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
nana can keg stand better than me. should i be proud?
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
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