maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I sang "A Whole New World" while I took his virginity
That is awesome that you did that.
Guess who's the proud owner of her very own foxtail butt plug!!
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
I need mimosas to revive my soul
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
