that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
Currently studying Econ, while waiting outside current booty call's residence for him to return from the strip club. This is your fault.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I can’t believe I made out with a flat earther and didn’t know about it until now!
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
Randomize
